T-Rex Milk Commercial

and Stanley brings us Roger

yesterday I posted about how Stanley, our lab/english setter came to help us out. today i need to tell you how Roger, our boston terrier came to help Stanley. . . and us too.

after Lacey completed high school by correspondence, tutoring, and internet class, she wanted/needed to try college. POTS was still in the picture but she had at least come to a point where she knew her boundaries (most of the time) and knew what to expect when she went outside those boundaries. (those boundaries included things like drinking enough liquids, keeping up a high salt intake, not getting overheated, making sure she got enough sleep, resting when needed.)

so Lacey signed up for some classes at our local jr. college and away she went. and Stanley, who had been with Lacey 24/7 for almost 3 years lost it. he suffered huge with separation anxiety. Dave took him to the vet and got a clean bill of physical health but Stanley was obviously not doing well. i talked to our vet's office and they suggested doggie prozac or a companion pet. well, that was not much of a choice for me. . . i'd take two dogs over one dog on medication any day. and this was Stanley we were talking about - our personal miracle worker in fur. we owed him.
so i talked with Dave. he was i think, hoping that Stanley would snap out of it and we wouldn't have to make a choice. . . but Stanley was not snapping anything. . .

in passing, we heard through the grapevine that a litter of pups had been born to Abby and Duke, Stanley's friends from where we used to live. Stanley had many romps with Duke, who lived next door and a very unfortunate one with Abby when she was puppy - she fractured a bone in her leg and had to wear a little doggie cast. Stanley did feel bad about that when we told him.

Dave said something like if we were to get another dog, a pup from them would be his choice.

i took that as a green light and called the owners only to find that no puppies were available - they were all spoken for. Ok, so much for that. so i talked to Dave about the disappointing news. Looking back, he did not seem as disappointed as i was. and he was not interested in looking for a second dog at the local shelter.

two weeks later the owners called and said a pup was now available and asked if we would want him. WOULD WE WANT HIM?????? are you kidding???? of course, we would - using the all inclusive "we." Karen did not tell Dave because she wanted to surprize him.

Her thinking. . . God's divine will. . . how could Dave argue with Him?

so two weeks later the puppy was picked up and brought to his new home. . . and we all lived happily ever after.

not quite.

Dave was not pleased and was pretty sure Karen's will got in the way of God's - Karen was not happy and did not agree with Dave's assessment of the will of God. but the puppy was adorable AND housebroken and within a couple of days there a was a noticeable improvement in Stanley.
so Roger became a Corlew dog and helped Stanley, the other Corlew dog through his separation anxiety.

so when people ask us about our dogs - we tell them Stanley is Lacey's dog and Roger is Stanley's.

POTS brings us Stanley

i have written about POTS before - twice actually. i wrote about the difficulty of living with POTS and about the whole gift of unanswered prayer that i got to unwrap.

but i didn't write to you about Stanley and how he came to rescue the Corlews. . .

it was before we had THE diagnosis - it was during the hard, dark time when we knew something was wrong but the medical community was convinced that this was depression. and yes, i would agree that there was depression - lacey depressed because of the never-ending-wicked headache and fatigue and light-headedness and loss of mobility and friends - dave and i worn out and down by the brick wall we kept running into - her siblings bewildered and tired of Lacey's illness being the focus of our family.

after a particularly depressing doctor appointment, i recieved a call from an affliate therapist who asked about Lacey and wondered if we had considered pet therapy. i assured him we had pets- a very fine feline by the name of Nelson and a tiny, tiny kitten name Lovey . "No, Mrs. Corlew - I mean a responsive pet, like a dog." we spoke for a few more minutes and then signed off. we never spoke again, i never got the chance to say "thank you."

we had given up our yellow lab the year before. Thor was Dave's dog, the son of two great hunting dogs. because Dave was not able to devote as much time to training Thor and hunting, the dog became a confused house dog. so Dave trained Thor to sit and stay and come and lay down. Thor did well with Dave but not so good with the rest of us (Becky has a good story about running around our neighborhood in her pj's trying to get Thor back home). we had bought a home in the country but on a busy road and knew that one distracted dog and one busy highway were not a good combination. Thor went to live with good friends with a fenced-in backyard and Dave decreed "no more dogs."

at our house, when Dave "decreeds" something, we all know not to mess with it. . . until we have to. i knew that discussion and manipulation were not options so i prayed. i remember laying in bed that night telling God that although i knew, i just knew a dog would help Lacey - there was nothing to be done unless HE chose to intervene.

the short story is that one of my co-workers came to me the very next day inquiring after Lacey's progress and wondering if we had considered therapy in the form of a puppy because his parent's dog had gotten in the family way and they would love to help us and give Lacey a puppy. (yep, i'm aware that that was one long, honkin' run-on sentence - i'm ok with that - try reading it out loud without taking a breath - that's exactly what the whole experience felt like)

wow! God had spoken and provided. . . how could Dave argue with Him???

Dave, Lacey, and I found ourselves on the other side of the cheddar curtain in Kenosha, meeting the mama dog, the papa dog, and all the pups. all Lacey can remember is sitting down on the floor and then Stanley was in her arms.

the owners gave us a dish towel to wrap him in for the ride home - we hadn't come prepared because Dave said we were just going to "look" at the pups. Dave was strangely quiet on the ride home. i didn't bother to inquire. . . this was between him and God.

Stanley did not cure Lacey but he did rescue us. he gave us a new focus, a reason to laugh and helped Lacey by needing to go out and be fed and be loved and love her back. he earned his place with the man of the house with his loyalty to Lacey, his gift of alerting us when she needed something, his ability to do something totally off the wall when the family's stress level got too high (yes, he opened the delivery box and ate the whole left-over pizza in the 27 seconds it took us to walk our guests to door and say good-bye - he did that all without the benefit of thumbs, we were mad but impressed).

Stanley was Lacey's best friend and smart enough to choose Dave as his next best friend. Dave accepted.

i believe in the difference a pet can make in lives of people struggling with illness.

i believe in a God who cares enough to send a puppy to a sick little girl and changes her father's mind.

CADBURYS EYEBROW DANCE ADVERT - DO THE DANCE!

Eyebrows dancing. . . and chocolate. . . i like it!

shattered stained glass part II

shatteredstainedglass.com is set to open its virtual doors sometime next week. it has been an adventure, to say the least but i have had the great privilege of traveling this road with 4 exceptional women. 4 women from different walks of life in different stages of life - brought together to accomplish that which none us could have done on her own. we have built it for us and women like us.

shatteredstainglass.com is for the woman who doesn't fit in with women's ministry, the woman who "tried" church and walked away more wounded than when she first walked in the door, the woman who finds that pat answers and caligraphy bible verses don't even begin to help with a life lived in the fast lane or the carpool.

it is for those of us who have tried make ourselves fit in with the "church ladies." (i mean no disrespect by that term - i have reserved it for those women who are comfortable and content with women's ministry today.)

side road - my value set was slightly off kilter compared to ladies in the Mary/Martha Missionary Circle. trust me, i admit it - i'm a little on the eccentric side. i would rather talk about theology than carpet stain removal. not that i didn't think that removing carpet stains isn't important - i'm just not wired to want to talk about it while hanging out with a group of women (ok, i'm not wired to want to talk about it with anyone, anywhere). and because they seemed to like talking about it. . . well, i knew something was definitely wrong with me.

i spent a lot of time looking for women like me and every once in a while i'd find one. but it truly was "every once in a while. . . " and we would try the "meeting" and end up going out for a cup of coffee afterwards to decompress. we would try a few more "meetings" and then just forgo them and meet at the restaurant. we would talk about politics and faith, money and faith, housework and a lack of faith, books and faith, sex and faith. . . basically, life and faith. no devotional, no church business, no small talk - real life and coffee with no pretense or masks. it was good. "as iron sharpens iron. . . "

part of the problem is that a lot of today's women's ministry is event driven. i personally do not enjoy ladies' teas or brunches or socials - never have. and i am not saying that they should be abolished. . . just that they don't meet the needs of a lot of women who are part of the church body.

a lot of women don't do small talk well. not to mention that events don't necessarily lend themselves to honest disclosure among the participants. events are a great way to introduce your group to new people and vice a versa - but we seem to be missing the next step - and since we're good at event planning. . . we plan another big event.

a lot of life gets lived in between those events - a lot of life that isn't "safe" table talk.

and the church/women's ministry leaders don't always recognize that today's women's ministry is NOT a one-size-fits-all. forty years ago the majority (ok, all but one) of gals in my mom's bible study were married with children and didn't work outside the home. her group met Wednesday mornings. many churches today - as an afterthought - are adding an evening bible study for women who work outside the home modeled after the morning study - and that may not be the right model to follow.

the majority of women's ministry efforts are directed at those women who are "free" during the day or the "big event" for everyone.

we need a mentoring, discipleship kind of ministry to women. we don't need to buy a workbook to go through with each other. we need to go through life with each other - walking, talking, crying, learning to be brave, learning when and where to say "yes, please" and "no, thank you very much." we need to acknowledge that LOTS of times there are no easy answers and there is nothing WE can DO. we need to own up to the fact that a life lived by faith should be exactly that - a life lived by faith (insert your favorite definition of faith right here).

we need to stop exploiting - and yes, i chose that word very carefully - women who have been to hell and back and lived to tell about it. a huge crisis traps you, consumes you, make whatever "IT" is the focal point of your incredibly human existence. and yes, a stronger and deeper faith can be forged in that tremendous heat and pressure.

but we are failing miserably in teaching/mentoring each other in the finer points of faith-living life day-to-day. some of us are not derailed by "the crisis" as much as we are the hundreds of little, important unimportant, seemingly inconsequential choices we make daily that slowly change our course, ever-so-slightly - and perhaps, even lead us - unknowingly to "the crisis."

a mentoring/discipleship, living life together ministry takes time and effort and can't usually be scheduled nicely to fit in a Daytimer or Blackberry. . .

so, our small attempt to meet our needs and those like us - shatteredstainedglass.com
contact me if you'd like an invitation. . .

"Portable 2 Compared to This Fish" - JOHN CLEESE Compaq Ad

we have come so so far. . .

what i'm reading at this moment

it is time again to share reading lists. . . here's mine. . . please don't hesitate to share yours.
outside of the first book, i have been caught up in reading for nostalgia's sake. . .

Real Christianity by William Wilberforce, Esq.
it's a modern translation of his work published in 1797. his work exploring and laying out authentic faith that eventually helped end slavery in England. it is a tremendous book - and the principles are timeless and very relevant to our world today, 212 years later.

The Weapon Makers by A. E. Van Vogt
just started reading this sci-fi paperback written 60 years ago. it is so interesting reading sci-fi from that time period. WW II is a fresh memory and manned space travel is still a dream. . . if you like science fiction and haven't read anything before 1975, go to the nearest used book store and pick out 5 or 6 paperbacks for a couple of bucks. great way to spend an evening while you're snowed in or under.

Ladies' Home Journal's Art of Homemaking by Virginia T. Habeeb
my mom had given me her copy when i first got married back in the olden days before cell phones, PCs, and dust busters. i found it when i was unpacking some boxes that haven't been opened since 1985. wow, have things changed and boy am i glad they have changed! in the section about kitchen, the author estimates that a woman spends a minimum of 28 hours a week in the kitchen for meal preparation alone (pg 292). that's a part-time job right there! i won't even comment on the 134 pages devoted to cleaning the house or the 83 pages on doing laundry or the 3 page on mending your clothes or the 16 pages on entertaining. . .

People Power by Thomas J. Stevenin, Ph.D
Dr. Stevenin was a professor that Dave had when he was working was working on his M.A. Dave really enjoyed the prof, the class, and this book. i have given many copies away over the years because it is a wonderful read on "tapping the spirit of quality performance and service in your organization" (taken straight off the front cover). the book is out of print but i have found it on the internet.

i just realized i am one book short of my usual five at a time. . . i'm slackin'. . .

reading outside your neighborhood

i gave up magazine subscriptions a couple of years ago when i realized that i was cluttering my house with paper books with good articles but lots more advertising than reading material. unless i was going to cut out the articles and file them ( i wasn't), i didn't need the extra bulk laying around.

so i only read magazines at the doctor's office or the hair salon.

but then my parents gave us a gift subscription to The Smithsonian for Christmas. it was an awesome gift. it was the kind of gift you never think to buy for yourself. it was a window to the world.

yeah, yeah. i know what you are thinking. . . the internet provides an entire window wall to the world. true. but i pick and choose what i want to look at when i am surfing. . . if it doesn't look interesting, i keep my mouse click to myself.

but The Smithsonian, now here is a magazine that has a wide variety of topics and photos and a smaller advert section than say. . . well, the magazine with the sweetened, condensed-version articles which has slowly become an advertising piece with reading material thrown in for good measure. and because The Smithsonian is so well done, it earns a place on my coffee table.

and people actually pick it up and read about something that they would probably never take the time to look at on the web.

see, i love the internet and all the good, the bad, and the ugly it has to offer. . . but i have become more selfish knowledge consumer and lost being a more well-rounded reader that a magazine like The Smithsonian encourages. and hey, they are running a subscription special of $12 for 12 issues right now.

so challenge yourself to read outside what you normally read this week. and go look at a copy of The Smithsonian. . . at least visit them on the web. . . who knows what you might find. . .

Arm Chair Theologians

i am a card carrying member of ACTs - Arm Chair Theologians. we started a local chapter - what the heck, it is the only chapter - for the discussion of theology, more specifically, practical theology. i know, is there any other kind?

we are a small, rag tag group of Christ followers - some married, some not - some young, some not - some male, some not. we hold our meetings at a local Panera amidst coffee mugs, scones, and the occasional Jones Soda. we have tackled two books so far. Rudolf Otto's The Idea of the Holy, which was quite the undertaking for our first book and The Shack by William P. Young.

i know. . . the first book being an English translation of a classic in religious philosophy, was written before WWII by a distinguished German theologian. i quote the back cover "The Idea of the Holy, (which) is fundamentally an inquiry into the non-rational factor in the idea of the divine and its relation to the rational. . ." we spent weeks on the idea of the "mysterium" and the "numinous." we would all admit to falling far short of what the author intended. but we tackled it and we discussed it and we re-read chapters as we tried to get our heads and lives around it. and we admitted defeat in trying to define the undefinable Holy God we serve. actually, it only solidified our resolve to stop trying to make "human" sense out of our lives and Him. He is a big God.

the second book might seem an odd choice to follow The Idea of the Holy. ok, i thought it was a weird choice. but we picked it because of the portrayal of God the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. i don't want to "wreck" the book for anyone so i'm not going to blog about the particulars. i was reading the book because a friend asked me to and i did it without seeing any of the reviews - so i hit the chapter where the main character meets up with God with no warning or preconceived notions. i think it was better that way. there is theology in them thar pages. . . not a typical presentation for sure but it was worth the read and the lively discussion that followed. some of us really liked it and some of us really didn't. but it was interesting to see the author try to answer the question of why bad things happen to good people and where God (all three of them) is in that answer.

the book we are starting this week is a book i mentioned yesterday A Contrarian's Guide to Knowing God; Spirituality for the Rest of Us by Larry Osborne. it is a book with a lot of the same questions i and my square peg friends have been asking - sometimes in hushed tones so as not to offend others with our lack of faith and decorum. seriously, it is really worth the read - even if you are not a contrarian. because, i bet you know or live with one. . .

i'll let you know how this goes.

hey, if you like theology, find some people smarter than you that like it too - and start your own chapter of ACTs. (sorry, bad pun, i know. but couldn't resist. . . )

putting God first - kinda

i wanted to quote a passage from Larry Osborne's A Contrarian's Guide to Knowing God for a couple of reasons. . .
1. it has got me re-thinking how i think about prioritizing my life
2. it might encourage you to read the book

In chapter twenty-one entitled "Priority Number One? Why Putting God First Might Be a Bad Idea," the author makes a rather startling confession. . .

"After years of muddling along trying to make God my first priority but never being quite sure what it meant, I finally gave up.

I stopped putting God first.

I put him in the middle.

Imagine a circle or a wheel with a hub and spokes. Now put God in the center hub. Each of the spokes represents an area or activity of life. It might be work, family, church, friends, interaction with your kids or spouse, mowing the lawn, or taking a nap.

Whatever it is, now imagine doing it for God."

(page 211)

i need pictures in my head to go along with my thoughts sometimes. they help me quickly remember whatever it is i want to remember. the "hub" is helping me remember God's place in my life in a way that JOY (Jesus first, Others second, Yourself last) never did.

i think i need to re-think my next tattoo. . .

Turkey Bowling PSA from the Greens and Grains grocery store

the evils of turkey bowling. . . hmmm. . . who would have thought?

waiting for the cable guy

well, my days have been filled with technical support calls to a) the internet provider b) the manufacturer of the router and c) the manufacturer of my computer. . . literally, hours of frustration with and without a phone attached to my head. literally, hours and hours without a) the internet b) a functional router or c) amazing results from the newest software with amazing diagnostic powers. oh yeah, and just for fun, intermittent home phone service and cable tv.

after finally concluding that the majority of fault lay with the internet provider. . . there was nothing to do but wait for the cable guy.

i know. i know that this is not a big deal in the grand scope of reality these days. there is the economy, the war, the "other" wars and genocides running concurrently with our war, global warming freezing our nether-parts clean off while burying us under considerable amounts of snow, the economy, the biggest Ponzi scheme earth has ever seen, and well, the economy.

i get that. but what scared me is how dependent we are all becoming on technology. and how sophisticated technology is becoming. (ok, all you with Macs, i am beginning to see the light. . . and after the hours i logged trying to get my pc to talk nicely with the router and the router to talk nicely with the modem and the modem to talk nicely with the internet. . . i can justify the expense next time around. but in the meantime, i am living in pc world/hell.)

there are a couple of family members who are committed to keeping our grandmas' computers running smoothly - as well as writing out EASY user instructions for them. if we didn't do that on a regular basis, neither nana would have her forwarded emails OR she would be paying big bucks to the guys in the white, short-sleeved shirts and skinny ties to figure out why her printer is not printing or why the font in her email mysteriously changed size yesterday. both grandmas have learned that email is a good way to touch base with a grandchild - yes, texting would be preferred over email but hey, they are just getting the hang of email. . .

computers connect us to each other - and us to our banks - and our banks to our mortgage lenders - and so on and so on. computers connect us to a truth that sometimes our news media is not willing to tell. computers supply us with a steady stream of knowledge and junk based completely on our whims and the strength of our character. they are part of the American household now.

i remember reading an article on "the home of the future" completely "run" by a computer. i no longer find that intriguing or comforting. i find it down right scary. my home at the mercy of software and hardware compatibility issues and power surges, not to mention, human error. . . i don't think so.

yeah, about that. . . the cable guys, (yes, they sent two of them) were here for a long, long time today. . . diagnosing and then ripping out and installing cable to correct the somewhat haphazardly built maze of coaxial we had running through our walls . . .

but resolving the main issue of no internet involved showing me the engaged "stand by" button on the modem which temporarily shut off our internet but not our phones or cable tv. . .

hmmmm, human error. . . mine.

2009 and simplicity

i don't "do" new year resolutions - probably because i suck at at them. but i decided this year, 7 hours and 43 minutes into it, that "simplicity" is my word for the next 12 months.

i know that simplicity is going to involve paring down and uncluttering my life a bit - that probably means i am going to have to devote some time to the throwing out or giving away everything that i'm not using. although i have made a conscious effort over the last 5 years to consider the time i will spend maintaining - dusting, vacuuming, cleaning, polishing, whatever - the object of my latest desire BEFORE i plunk down my hard earned cash, i still have stuff that i don't need and i'm not using.

one place simplicity has kinda worked in the past is my wardrobe - and i use the term "wardrobe" loosely - my closet is a study in black - jackets, pants, and skirts. i have shirts that are different colors but i do have to admit to wearing black shirts with the black jackets and pants and skirts a lot - me and Johnny Cash - what can i say? i made that wardrobe choice when my kids were young and i went back to work part-time and then full-time. with a black wardrobe i didn't have to waste precious time contemplating what matched - it all did and does. (i do own a few pairs blue jeans but i pare them with black shirts and jackets, of course.) i wonder how much contemplating time i've saved over the years??

side road - i prefer color in my surroundings. a gallon of paint is the simplest, cheapest, easiest way to change the mood of a room. i cook in an ocean-blue and white kitchen, study and blog in an ocean-green and white office, and read or play the piano in a honey-mustard living room. i haven't painted the rest of the walls because my better half is part Norwegian. And that "part" is committed to white food (no joke - fish, potatoes, bread, kumla=dumplings, kringla=sugar cookies without the sugar) and white walls. i count this "color deferment" as part of my wifely submission duties - i'm not sure God does, or Dave for that matter. but i'm hoping to win them both over with my sincerety. :)

back to simplicity. . .
a friend gave me a very cool bulletin-board thing - it sits on my desk. right now i can look over and read the name of a woman i have never met. she is a friend of a friend. her name on that scrap of paper represents all the women who don't fit in easily at church or women's ministry. she represents the kind of women that Shattered Stained Glass is hoping to reach. seeing her name daily has served to remind me - push me - challenge me to do my best for her.

it can be a powerful thing. . . one printed word.

so this morning i added another piece of paper with the word "simplicity" - another reminder, another push, another challenge. no goal here, really. . . just fine-tuning a mindset.

simplicity - a call to major on the majors and minor on the minors. . . less drama, less stress, less stuff.

a good read and resource on simplicity. . . Sarah Ban Breathnach's Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy, The Simple Abundance Companion, and Simple Abundance Journal of Gratitude